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Wednesday, April 7, 2010

This Is Why I Love Reading News On The Internet!

I was reading the news on the internet as usual today when I came across this gem. I was reading the news story about the US military missing its copy of the Iraq killing video when I came across this comment by a certain John (of which I have attached a screen-shot below).


For those who found it difficult to read the screen-shot, here is the text of the comment:

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Fellow participants in the column, I have reviewed your comments, and I have found them to be lacking in proper grammar, spelling, and word choice. I have decided to give a short lesson on the use of the English language, which will be followed by a quiz to confirm you have absorbed the message. One ought not omit to commit to memory certain commonly misspelled words. Such words include: they're & their, than & then, and to & too & two. In addition, many people attempt to spell phrases phonetically, rather than using their actual wording, such as "should/would of" instead of the correct "should/would have".

Example
Sharks are awesome. Their the best predator in the ocean, way cooler then anything else.

Correct version
Sharks are awesome. *They're the greatest predators in the ocean, and are in fact far cooler *than any other predator.

Now it is your turn.

Respond to the following questions.
Your response will be graded on a scale of 10 for proper grammar and spelling.
Scores of 8 and above will be considered passing.

Q--- If the quick fox jumps over the lazy brown dog, where will he land?
A--

Q-- How now brown cow?
A--

Q- Doth the rain in Spain stay mainly on the plain?
A--

Thank you all for your time and participation, please return to the debate.
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If and when I can read such a comment when I am reading a newspaper article, then I will switch back to reading newspapers instead of getting my news off the internet. Until then . . .

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